Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
