I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Randomize
