hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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