your thong is hanging out like whoa
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
