i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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