I don't think brook has ever known best
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
