its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
