I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
