You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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