I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'm eating all of the evidence.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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