of course. lets lasso hookers.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
