Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
Randomize
