My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize