I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
