it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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