I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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