margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize