You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
