dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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