everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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