White coat. Heels.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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