sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
