I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
