I am full of burrito and curiosity
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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