some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize