Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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