Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
