So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
50% drunk capacity currently
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
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