im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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