I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
