it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
