Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Randomize
