you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
