I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
