Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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