i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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