You smell like stripper and shame
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
