Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
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