I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize