put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I can tuck mytits in my pants
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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