Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
