He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
