Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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