Non-Jews are for practice
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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