Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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