y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize