just come out here and I will go home with you...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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