You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'm at about main and main street
PS: I just woke up from my shower
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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