I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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