Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
